Don't Judge
A
lady in a faded gingham dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun threadbare
suit, stepped off the train in Boston, and walked timidly without an appointment
into the Harvard University President's outer office.
The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks
had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Cambridge.
She frowned.
"We
want to see the President," the man said softly.
"He'll
be busy all day," the secretary snapped.
"We'll
wait," the lady replied.
For
hours, the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become
discouraged and go away. They didn't and the secretary grew frustrated and
finally decided to disturb the President, even though it was a chore she always
regretted.
"Maybe
if they just see you for a few minutes, they'll leave," she told him.
He sighed in exasperation and nodded.
Someone
of his importance obviously didn't have the time to spend with them, but he
detested gingham dresses and homespun suits cluttering up his outer office. The
President, stern-faced with dignity, strutted toward the couple.
The
lady told him, "We had a son who attended Harvard for one year.
He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally
killed. And my husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere on
campus. The President wasn't
touched, he was shocked.
"Madam," he said gruffly. "We can't put up
a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place
would look like a cemetery." "Oh, no," the lady explained
quickly. "We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give
a building to Harvard."
The
president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit,
then exclaimed, "A building! Do you have any earthly idea how much a
building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical
plant at Harvard."
For
a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. He could get rid of
them now. And the lady turned to her husband and said quietly, "Is that all
it costs to start a university? Why don't we just start our own?"
Her husband nodded. The
President's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment.
And
Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford walked away, traveling to Palo Alto, California
where they established the university that bears their name, a memorial to a son
that Harvard no longer cared about.
You
can easily judge the character of others by how they treat those who can do
nothing for them or to them. -- by
Malcolm Forbes
THE ANT AND THE FEATHER
One morning I wasted nearly an hour watching a tiny ant
carry a huge feather across my back terrace.
Several times it was confronted by obstacles in its path and after a
momentary pause it would make the necessary detour. At one point the ant had to
negotiate a crack in the concrete about 10mm wide.
After brief contemplation the ant laid the feather over the crack, walked
across it and picked up the feather on the other side then continued on its way.
I was fascinated by the ingenuity of this ant, one of God's
smallest creatures. It served to reinforce the miracle of creation. Here was a
minute insect, lacking in size yet equipped with a brain to reason, explore,
discover and overcome. But this ant, like the two-legged co-residents of
this planet, also shares human failings. After some time the ant finally reached
its destination - a flower bed at the end of the terrace and a small hole that
was the entrance to its underground home. And it was here that the ant finally
met its match. How could that large feather possibly fit down that small hole?
Of course it couldn't. So the ant, after all this trouble and exercising great
ingenuity, overcoming problems all along the way, just abandoned the feather and
went home.
The ant had not thought the problem through before it began
its epic journey and in the end the feather was nothing more than a burden.
Isn't life like that!
We worry about our family, we worry about money or the lack
of it, we worry about work, about where we live, about all sorts of things.
These are all burdens - the things we pick up along life's path and lug them
around the obstacles and over the crevasses that life will bring, only to find
that at the destination they are useless and we can't take them with us.
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Years ago, there was a very wealthy man who, with his devoted
young son, shared a passion for art collecting. Together they traveled around
the world, adding only the finest art treasures to their collection. Priceless
works by Picasso, Van Gogh, Monet and many others adorned the walls of the
family estate.
The widowed elder man looked on with satisfaction, as his only child became an
experienced art collector. The son's trained eye and sharp business mind caused
his father to beam with pride as they dealt with art collectors around the
world.
As winter approached, war engulfed the nation, and the young man left to serve
his country. After only a few short weeks, his father received a telegram.
His beloved son was missing in action. The art collector anxiously awaited more
news, fearing he would never see his son again.
Within days, his fears were confirmed. The young man had died while rushing a
fellow soldier to a medic.
Distraught and lonely, the old man faced the upcoming Easter holidays with
anguish and sadness. The joy of the season, a season that he and his son had so
looked forward to, would visit his house no longer. On Easter morning, a knock
on the door awakened the depressed old man.
As he walked to the door, the masterpieces of art on the walls only reminded him
that his son was not coming home. As he opened the door, he was greeted by a
soldier with a large package in his hand. He introduced himself to the man by
saying, "I was a friend of your son. I was the one he was rescuing
when he died. May I come in for a few moments? I have something to show
you."
As the two began to talk, the soldier told of how the man's son had told
everyone of his father's love of fine art. "I'm an artist," said the
soldier, "and I want to give you this." As the old man unwrapped the
package, the paper gave way to reveal a portrait of the man's son. Though the
world would never consider it the work of a genius, the painting featured the
young man's face in striking detail. Overcome with emotion, the man
thanked the soldier, promising to hang the picture above the fireplace. A
few hours later, after the soldier had departed, the old man set about his task.
True to his word, the painting went above the fireplace, pushing aside thousands
of dollars of paintings. And then the man sat in his chair and spent Easter
gazing at the gift he had been given. During the days and weeks that followed,
the man realized that even though his son was no longer with him, the boy's life
would live on because of those he had touched. He would soon learn that his son
had rescued dozens of wounded soldiers before a bullet stilled his caring heart.
As the stories of his son's gallantry continued to reach him, fatherly pride and
satisfaction began to ease the grief. The painting of his son soon became his
most prized possession, far eclipsing any interest in the pieces for which
museums around the world clamored. He told his neighbors it was the
greatest gift he had ever received. The following spring, the old man
became ill and passed away. The art world was in anticipation.
With the collector's passing, and his only son dead, those paintings would be
sold at an auction. According to the will of the old man, all of the art works
would be auctioned on Easter day, the day he had received his greatest gift.
The day soon arrived and art collectors from around the world gathered to bid on
some of the world's most spectacular paintings. Dreams would be fulfilled
this day; greatness would be achieved as many would claim "I have the
greatest collection." The auction began with a painting that was not on any
museum's list. It was the painting of the man's son. The auctioneer asked for an
opening bid. The room was silent. "Who will open the bidding with
$100?" he asked. Minutes passed. No one spoke. From the back of the
room came, "Who cares about that painting? It's just a picture of his son.
Let's forget it and go on to the good stuff." More voices echoed in
agreement. "No, we have to sell this one first," replied the
auctioneer.
"Now, who will take the son?" Finally, a friend of the old man spoke.
"Will you take ten dollars for the painting? That's all I have. I knew the
boy, so I'd like to have it." "I have ten dollars. Will anyone go
higher?" called the auctioneer. After more silence, the auctioneer said,
"Going once, going twice. Gone." The gavel fell. Cheers filled
the room and someone exclaimed, "Now we can get on with it and we can bid
on these treasures!" The auctioneer looked at the audience and announced
the auction was over.
Stunned disbelief quieted the room. Someone spoke up and asked, "What do
you mean it's over? We didn't come here for a picture of some old guy's son.
What about all of these paintings? There are millions of dollars of art here! I
demand that you explain what's going on here!" The auctioneer
replied, "It's very simple. According to the will of the father, whoever
takes the son . . . gets it all!"
Just as those art collectors discovered on that Easter day, the message is still
the same - the love of a Father - a Father whose greatest joy came from His Son
who went away and gave his life rescuing others. And because of that Father's
love...whoever takes the Son gets it all.
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TIME MANAGEMENT EXPERT
One day an
expert in time management was speaking to a group of business students and, to
drive home a point, used an illustration those students will never forget.
As this stood in front of the group of high powered overachievers he
said, "Okay, time for a quiz." Then
he pulled out a one-gallon, wide mouth mason jar and set it on the table in
front of him. Then he produced about a dozen fist-sized rocks and carefully
placed them, one at a time, into the jar. When
the jar was filled to the top and no more rocks would fit inside, he asked,
"Is this jar full?" Everyone in the class said, "Yes."
Then he said,
"Really?" He
reached under the table and pulled out a bucket of gravel.
Then he dumped some gravel in and shook the jar causing pieces of gravel
to work themselves down into the space between the big rocks.
Then he asked the group once more, "Is the jar full?"
By this time
the class was on to him. "Probably
not," one of them answered. "Good!" he replied.
He reached under the table and brought out a bucket of sand.
He started dumping the sand in the jar and it went into all of the spaces
left between the rocks and the gravel. Once
more he asked the question, "Is this jar full?"
"No!" the class shouted. Once again he said, "Good."
Then he grabbed a pitcher of water and began to pour it in until the jar
was filled to the brim. Then he
looked at the class and asked, "What is the point of this
illustration?" One eager
beaver raised his hand and said, "The point is, no matter how full your
schedule is, if you try really hard you can always fit some more things in
it!"
"No,"
the speaker replied, "that's not the point.
The truth this illustration teaches us is: If you don't put the big rocks in first, you'll never get
them in at all." What are the
'big rocks' in your life? Time with
your loved ones? Your faith, your
education, your dreams? A worthy
cause? Teaching or mentoring
others? Remember to put these BIG
ROCKS in first or you'll never get them in at all.
So, tonight, or in the morning, when you are reflecting on this short
story, ask yourself this question: What are the 'big rocks' in my life? Then, put those in your jar first.
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1. Take into account that great
love and great achievements involve great risks.
2. When you lose, don't lose the
lesson.
3. Follow the three R's: Respect
for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions.
4. Remember that not getting what
you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how
to break them properly.
6. Don't let a little dispute
injure a great friendship.
7. When you realize you've made a
mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change but
don't let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is
sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honorable life.
Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it for the
second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your
home is the foundation for your happiness.
13. In disagreements with loved
ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It's a
way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth.
16. Once a year, go someplace
you've never been before.
17. Remember that the best
relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each
other.
18. Judge your success by what you
had to give up in order to get it.
19. Approach love and cooking with
reckless abandon.
Bill Gates' Advice
Here's some advice Bill Gates recently dished out at a high school speech
about 11 things they did not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good,
politically correct teaching has created a full generation of kids with no
concept of reality and how this concept sets them up for failure in the real
world.
RULE 1
Life is not fair - get used to it.
RULE 2
The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to
accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
RULE 3
You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school.
You won't be a vice president with a car phone, until you earn both.
RULE 4
If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn't
have tenure.
RULE 5
Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a
different word for burger flipping - they called it opportunity.
RULE 6
If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your
mistakes, learn from them.
RULE 7
Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now.
They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and
listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain
forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the
closet in your own room.
RULE 8
Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not.
In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as
many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the
slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
RULE 9
Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very
few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your
own time.
RULE 10
Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave
the coffee shop and go to jobs.
RULE 11
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
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I'VE LEARNED - . . .
I've learned-
that you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is be someone who can be
loved. The rest is up to them.
I've learned-
that no matter how much I care,
some people just don't care back.
I've learned-
that it takes years to build up trust,
and only seconds to destroy it.
I've learned-
that it's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts.
I've learned-
that you can get by on charm for about
fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better know something.
I've learned-
that you shouldn't compare
yourself to the best others can do.
I've learned-
that you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.
I've learned-
that it's taking me a long time
to become the person I want to be.
I've learned-
that you should always leave loved ones
with loving words. It may be the last
time you see them.
I've learned-
that you can keep going
long after you can't.
I've learned-
that we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel.
I've learned-
that either you control your attitude
or it controls you.
I've learned-
that regardless of how hot and steamy
a relationship is at first, the passion fades
and there had better be something else to
take its place.
I've learned-
that heroes are the people
who do what has to be done
when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.
I've learned-
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I've learned-
that my best friend and I can do anything
or nothing and have the best time.
I've learned-
that sometimes the people you expect
to kick you when you're down
will be the ones to help you get back up.
I've learned-
that sometimes when I'm angry
I have the right to be angry,
but that doesn't give me
the right to be cruel.
I've learned-
that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.
I've learned-
that just because someone doesn't love
you the way you want them to doesn't
mean they don't love you with all they have.
I've learned-
that maturity has more to do with
what types of experiences you've had
and what you've learned from them
and less to do with how many
birthdays you've celebrated.
I've learned-
that your family won't always be there for you.
It may seem funny, but people you aren't
related to can take care of you and love you
and teach you to trust people again. Families
aren't biological.
I've learned-
that no matter how good a friend is,
they're going to hurt you every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.
I've learned-
that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by
others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive
yourself.
I've learned-
that no matter how bad your heart is broken
the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I've learned-
that our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.
I've learned-
that just because two people argue,
it doesn't mean they don't love each other
And just because they don't argue,
it doesn't mean they do.
I've learned-
that we don't have to change friends
if we understand that friends change.
I've learned-
that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a
secret. It could change your life forever.
I've learned-
that two people can look at the exact same thing
and see something totally different.
I've learned-
that no matter how you try to protect your
children, they will eventually get hurt and
you will hurt in the process.
I've learned-
that your life can be changed in a matter of
hours by people who don't even know you.
I've learned-
that even when you think you have no more
to give, when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help.
I've learned-
that credentials on the wall
do not make you a decent human being.
I've learned-
that the people you care about most in life
are taken from you too soon.
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LIVING LIFE TO THE
FULLEST
Give people more than they expect
and do it cheerfully.
Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have, or sleep
all you'd like.
Memorize your favorite poem.
Don't believe all you hear.
Don't spend all you have.
Don't sleep all you want.
When you say, "I love
you", mean it.
When you say, "I'm sorry",
look the person in the eye.
Be engaged at least six months
before you get married.
Believe in love at first sight.
Never laugh at anyone's dreams.
Love deeply and passionately. You
might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
In disagreements, fight fairly. No
name calling.
Don't judge people by their
relatives.
Talk slowly, but think quick.
When someone asks you a question you
don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"
Remember that great love and great
achievements involve great risk.
Call your parents.
Say, "God bless you," when
you hear someone sneeze.
When you lose, don't lose the
lesson.
Remember the three R's: respect for
self; respect for others; responsibility for all your actions.
Don't let a little dispute injure a
great friendship.
When you realize you've made a
mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
Smile when picking up the phone. The
caller will hear it in your voice.
Marry a person you love to talk to.
As you get older, his or her conversational skills will be as important as any
other.
Spend some time alone.
Constant socializing can be draining.
Open your arms to change, but don't
let new ideas dilute your principles.
When you don't know what to do, pray. You'll be
surprised at how much it will help you decide.
A loving atmosphere in your home is important. It
will also help keep your children from needing therapy.
Remember that silence is sometimes
the best answer.
Read more books and watch less TV.
Live a good, honorable life. Then
when you get older and think back, you'll get to enjoy it a second time.
Trust in God but lock your car.
A loving atmosphere in your home is
so important. Do all you can to create a tranquil, harmonious home.
In disagreements with loved ones,
deal with a current situation. Don't bring up the past.
Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have
dreams will never accomplish much.
Read between the lines.
Share your knowledge. It's a way to
achieve immortality.
Be gentle with the earth.
Pray. There's immeasurable power in
it.
Never interrupt when you are being
flattered. Say, "Thank you."
Mind your own business.
Never let your mouth get ahead of your head.
Don't trust a person who doesn't
close his or her eyes when you kiss them.
Once a year, go someplace you've
never been before.
Trust in God, but lock your car.
If you make a lot of money, put it
to use helping others while you are living. That is wealth's greatest
satisfaction.
Remember that not getting what you
want may be the best thing that never happened to you.
Learn the rules, then break some.
Remember that the best relationship
is one where your love for each other is greater than your need for each other.
Judge your success by what you had
to give up in order to get it.
Remember that your character is your
destiny.
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We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are
pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors
... but they all have to learn to live in the same box.
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